pants.

With new school years... comes new confusion.
Oysh gabibble.
I just read the last year or so in my blogs (mind you, that's like a grand total of three posts) and after that... it's like, "WOW, MURIE, DID YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND OR SOMETHING?" Well cheah.
So that ended.
On my terms.
Fun stuff.
So school is exhausting. For the majority of the last weeks, I've spent over 12 hours at school a day. I am so tired. My schedule is wake up, school, rehearsal, yearbook, psatprep, home, homework, try to sleep. Lather rinse repeat....
...which is why I'm blogging.
Speaking of rehearsal. Mrs. Shomper is at it again with Romeo and Juliet, yours truly starring as the title character... the Nurse. But no, seriously, the nurse is what's up. She's making it neo modern. All boys in skinny jeans. You want monks? No, you get matrixesque religiousmaybe figures. I want to wear momjeans so bad.
I miss nysssa. I miss being with those people every day because I can feel myself growing apart from certain kids and ahhh. Sometimes I'll just look up in class and say to myself "Gosh, it's 8:52. I'm late to being early to movement class." And it's so weird to not have coffee in my hand, striding up the stairs to the dance studio in my rehearsal skirt and legwarmers, ready learn how to minuet.
I never posted all summer. Huh. I was going to have a nysssa blog. But I was too busy... hahaha. I thought I would have time to blog... yeeeeah.
Camp Cory was, as ever, a success. My cabin kicked butt, and I believe that I was the king of the counselors, as, that's right, I won the Game. The ace of diamonds is now named after me.
These have abruptly stopped being funny. maybe I should journal for real HA THAT'D BE REAL OLDSCHOOL.

New Post

Blogging. It happens.
New school year, new stress.
After NYSSSA, of course, this is all busy work.
I miss the days when the most horrifying thing was Lizzy, who, despite my lingering terror, I think I love to death. Oh, to be yelled at for schmacting, or for masturbating on stage, or for not telling my story truthfully. Oh, to be making the eiffel tower out of ice cream, oh to be seducing josef. Why did I have to leave? Life changing. It was life changing.
Did you know that I am horribly shy? That I can't stand to be in the spotlight if I have to be myself? That all previous conceptions of love I had were incorrect? That snorting powdered sugar you found lying around in the common room is a great idea? That I have made some of the best friends I will ever have? That maybe, just maybe, I, as just me, will always be enough?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjFaenf1T-Y
Well, that was a nice crying rant I just went on.
Junior Year. Is happening.
I am so busy, my entire week went like this: rehearsal for R&J, yearbook, homecoming responsibilities.
Last night was fun though. The dance was a sock hop, which most people hated. I loved it. I finally got to make a poodle skirt, a pursuit I lost all hope of when my best friend in fourth grade told me that "everyone does that, it's tacky" we all went out for milkshakes and everyone dressed up and we danced the night away - the twist, charleston, lindy, swing.
On a silly note, Juniors lost homecoming. Again.
The skit got second place though, so I'm fine. Whatever.
Okay, I'm mostly done. Thing of note: confusion. I wish I was asexual. Like a lot.

the three gs of imperialism: gold, glory, god... and girls!

remember that time, oh, that time when i auditioned for nysssa?
and i really, really, sucked?

i am one of thirty students, chosen from all of new york, who has been invited to the new york state summer school of the art's school of theater. not toe damned bad.
i'm a champion.
no one reads this, so i'd just like to take an un-judged second to just stew in how excellent this is. i was chosen, out of over 450 students. 6% of those kiddos were chosen. .2% of those kiddos are me.
mindblowing.
i'm still so shocked.
i might be kinda really good at this acting thing.
okay so i'm done.

i don't even know what else to write.

oh, the yearbook is indeed finished. (i'm just running over with grand news.) and i was indeed credited as an editor - the sole editor - of the minimag. fwa-cha!... and stuff.

i saw dr horribles live the other day. it was interesting. dr horrible had a ponytail. the bad horse chorus was positively wonderful though. speaking of musicals, godspell is coming up. i do declare that everything sucks, except for possibly everything that has to do with jeremy. he is such a delight.

enough rambling. i'm not even going to read this over. i'm sure it's less than... stellar, but you know.

this title is relevant to my piece.

my index of posts is full of half written bites of nonsense, mostly starting with "so much has happened since i last posted"
but really, so much has.
i guess i'm not blogging anymore since i don't really feel like i have a reason.

not to step on any toes here, but let's be serious.

i suppose cara's blogging... if she reads other people's....

heavens, i've had quite the busy day.
it started with my nysssa audition.
i was really excited.
really, really, excited.
i did a monologue from twelfth night and the effect of gamma rays on the man in the moon marigolds.
really, really, excited.
i was sent away with a "some people have to try out multiple times before getting in"

really, really, excited.

in other news... i've been essentially made an editor of the yearbook, which is beyond wonderful. not only am i an editor, but i will be overseeing the best portion: the minimag. i'm not quite sure for which purpose the minimag was created, but i like to think it was for made especially for the weird (a little too) creative kids that shirk their yearbook responsibilities for the more productive task of going on to dictionary.com and amusing fellow staff members by making a symphony out of the little pronouncer dude saying various silly words... and were thus condemned to write humorous blurbs about things people generally don't care about. and that, my friends, is what i will be doing next year. the writing, that is. i did the symphony thing this year. and got kicked out of the meeting.
i imagine it's kind of like what having my very own column in trapezoid would be like, only it's 16 pages long and it doesn't have any requirements, much less a set in stone deadline.
(watch someone from yearbook find this and decide i'm not 'editor material'.)

tomorrow is valentines day.
i'm still dating that kid.
i asked him to be romantic for valentines day.
he said "murie, do you know who you're dating?"
we're going out for dinner though, which will be nice.
but you know...

alex jones shaved all his lovely hair off and i simply can't deal with it.

that about sums up my life at this moment in time.

oh, and i had a muffin for breakfast.

aalkfjek;lafj

So my fingers literally keep taking me to my blog, without my permission. It is a wonderful surprise that i feel the need to write so.
asdfghjkl;.
This weekend my grandpa turned 90. big fun. also, liam and i have been dating for ten months. thats practically ten years! kinda... i don't know. he's awful nice to me. he also has a lot of facial hair alllll over.
i'm so tired i don't even know what to write.
sometimes i make jokes on here?
has anyone heard of jesse slaughter? damn, i feel so bad for that girl. i mean, shes talking complete shit and sounds a little like an idiot, but she's eleven. her brain has hardly developed. my brain, for that matter has hardly developed. she's completely responsible, but at the same time, she just can't be. i doubt, so much, even if she wasn't getting death threats and didn't have a lot of 'haters' that in ten years she'll look back on those videos and be proud. in ten years, i'll probably either have forgotten this, the world will have ended, or i'll chuckle a little when i realize how limited my view of the world was (is?). not to mention how that will follow her. It will take her years before people stop associating the name 'jesse slaughter' with the emotionally tattered eleven year old screaming profanities into the camera. even after that, if she even tries to be some sort of public figure, it'll be dug up all over again and blown out of proportion again.
well, apparently i had a lot to say about that...
did i tell you that i'm elizabeth proctor in the crucible yet? well yes. i am... anyway. i have to memorize so many things.
also....?
my parents hit a deer? the car is all broked.
rory's girlfriend came over to dinner tonight and first thing my mom asks her is "so, emily, has anyone you know ever run into a deer?"
good stuff, mom.

Blogging? Again? So soon? wwwwhuuuut

Well... Boredom seems to have gotten the best of me. Even though i should technically be writing my dungeons and dragons character's backstory or finishing my chem homework or reading gone with the wind and swooning over rhett butler and having to remind myself every couple chapters that i have a boyf and i am indeed not scarlett o'hara (i mix this up quite frequently) or making sure my body is clean enough to be carted off to school tomorrow....
Yeah. You heard me, did you see how i slipped it in so smoothly? dungeons and dragons. murwee's first campaign. big whoops indeed. i'm so excited. i feel like such a nerd. therefore i am excited.
Oh, another thing i should be doing, preparing for the crucible auditions tomorrow. i'm so nervous. i'm afraid that my wonderful, smart, wise, pretty, etc. director won't give me a part. but she has to. when she signed my student council recommendation last year, she said "okay, i'll reccommend you as long as this doesn't get in the way of what i want to do with you next year." that means something, right? and my 24 hour play performance was mad tight. i don't know. i'm still really nervous. the rest of the stuff doesn't really matter. it's the auditions that do. so i better do good at them. hahaha. i sound incredibly intelligent. seriously though. if i don't get a part, its safe to say that i will be heartbroken. this is my year. i deserve it. right?
enough of that. as scarlett always says... i'll think of it tomorrow.

erf.
Music: in the aeroplane over sea, neutral milk hotel and shadowcasting, ra ra riot
Food: birthday cake. yeah. mad spiffy. and i'm still in my jam jams. jealous?
Halloween Costume: southern belle. that's right. i have a wedding dress i'm pimping out. it'll probably change next week but for right now, this is gonna be sexy.

so... it's been a while...

i haven't blogged...
in a rather long time.
i suppose i didn't really see any need to.
now that my readers have dropped to somewhere around .734....
anyway.
summer happened.
i went to triennium.
which was disappointing.
and i'm supposed to talk about my experience and how it changed me in front of the prebytery (a bunch of stuffy old people) which wouldn't be a problem, except i'm doing it for jane and therefore i want to do a really, really, good job to make her proud... but it didnt really affect me... except being the root of an extreme faith crisis... but that's too personal and big to give a minute's speech about to a bunch of old people... and it would probably negatively affect any funding they would do for next year's trip... and i wouldn't want to do that...
anyway...
gun lake was fantastic as well.
liam got me a little statue of a turtle standing on a turtle with a dragon's head from archimage. i named them stan and delmar.
i like him.
anywho...
then came cory. i had the most wonderful campers in the whole wide world. we even tamed the girl that was supposed to be the unruliest of all the fishies. for our skit we completely choreographed bohiemian rhapsody... and it was spectatular... owen passed on the herbal essences legacy to harrison... and henry tried to drag me, literally kicking and screaming, throwing myself on the ground so he would have to drag me over the muddy field, into jail during capture the flag, which i was immediately freed from... all in all, a really good week. i haven't slept in my own bed at all... so i'm pretty tired... i miss camp though. rehearsals sucked balls but i'd rather be there then have my grueling schedule...
i have six frees... out of forty eight periods... urgh. at least i have some with liam. i'm kind of secretly nervous about us for the first semester or so... i can honestly say he means more to me than the majority of all the things that are going to be stealing my time from me... but that doesn't mean i'll have the guts to quit them for him. i dunno... merf. we. will. get. through. it. it. will. be. great. i don't necessarily have any reason for thinking that we'll break up, otherwise than the spending time together obstacle, other than my hatred for all males and general distrust of them... we're doing really well. there's a couple things i'd like to talk about but can't on here... but it's okay. i should be talking to him about that anyway...
wow. apparently i had lots to talk about? makes sense... i haven't blogged alll summer.
i guess i figured i didn't really need to.
i still don't know if i want to.... we'll see...
liam... should be here...